Summer 1988.
My wife Susan and I had been married just over a year. We lived next door to her parents (I know, believe me, I know…).
I was working shifts and often at home during the day. Susan was working standard days and usually out. Susan’s best friend Lynne would often pop in for a coffee with me when walking her dog. Susan’s mum had (unfounded) suspicions about this…
On this occasion, the sun was shining so we had our coffee sitting on the lawn out back. We could hear Susan’s parents chatting as they worked in their garden on the other side of the tall hedge.
After a little while Lynne’s dog, Jess, got bored of all this sitting around and started to mess around. Resulting in Lynne screaming at the top of her voice:
“GET YOUR TONGUE OUT OF MY EAR!”
Next door went totally silent……….
A few weeks later:
Another coffee visit. Susan arrives just after Lynne has gone. Susan’s mum makes a point of telling her this on the doorstep. Susan comes into the house to discover me in the bedroom pulling my trousers on…
There is actually a perfectly innocent explanation for this – can anyone guess what it is in the comments?
The dog knocked the coffee onto your lap?
LikeLiked by 3 people
Close!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Answer now published below!
LikeLiked by 2 people
This is good…I agree, the dog knocked the coffee onto your pants.
LikeLiked by 3 people
Close!
LikeLiked by 2 people
I will go with Jess, the dog, stuck his tongue in YOUR ear and you spilled your coffee ☕️
LikeLiked by 3 people
Nope.
LikeLiked by 2 people
any hints? buddy!
LikeLiked by 2 people
The top answer was along the right lines….
LikeLiked by 2 people
Answer now published below😄
LikeLiked by 1 person
Answer now published below😄
LikeLiked by 1 person
You just woke up ?
LikeLiked by 2 people
Nope.
LikeLiked by 2 people
The dog peed on your laps
LikeLiked by 2 people
It would not surprise me with Jess, but nope😊
LikeLiked by 2 people
Hmmm too dirty?
LikeLiked by 2 people
😊
LikeLiked by 2 people
Does than mean yes?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Nope!
LikeLiked by 2 people
😄😄😄
Some juice spilled?
Did the dog bit you?
Did the dog spill saliva on your pants
LikeLiked by 1 person
First one is getting closer…
LikeLiked by 2 people
Hnmm some soda perhaps?😂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Juice spilled on you ?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Answer now published below😄
LikeLiked by 2 people
What a funny post! It goes to say that sometimes things are not what they seem. My guess is Lynn got to your place early and you were still wearing your bathrobe. When she left you just went to get dress.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Imaginative answer…😊❤️
LikeLiked by 2 people
You inspire me! ❤️ 😊 ❤️
LikeLiked by 1 person
OK one last try… The trousers were dirty (how they got too dirty remains a mystery, maybe because of the dog who may have tried to slurp some coffee out of your cup) and you had to wash the stain right away. Susan got back just a few minutes after you took them out of the dryer machine. You know I am curious person and this mystery is driving me insane, right? Hope you will end my suffering soon. 😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
Another imaginative answer. You are doing well my dear!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Another imaginative answer…
LikeLiked by 2 people
Answer now published below😄
LikeLiked by 2 people
It’s about time! I am officially an insane person now because of you. xoxo
LikeLiked by 2 people
Driving people mad is one of my specialities! Dx
LikeLiked by 2 people
Ha, ha… It’s probably this kind of madness (see the link). Everyone is mad about you dear friend: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KmwtL3fZOYg
LikeLiked by 2 people
Brilliant😄.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Haha!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Lol, at least the mother in law didn’t come in with your wife……that would have been interesting 😂😂😂😂
LikeLiked by 4 people
It would indeed! Scary thought! 😊
LikeLiked by 3 people
😬😂
LikeLiked by 2 people
Answer now published below😄
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hmmm… there was obviously spillage of some sort. It wasn’t coffee. You are English. It must have been tea!!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Tea? Nope. I am a coffee man all the way. Still wrong though.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Yeah, coffee rules. Ok, this has to be the right answer. You were making coffeecake for your coffee date and inadvertently got a bit of the batter on your pants. It wasn’t until the dog tried to lick your crotch that you realized the bit of errant batter ended up there. How batter got on that particular part of your pants is mystery to me, but I’m sure you have a good reason. It was only then that the dog moved on to your friend’s ear and thereby provoking the “get out of my ear” response. Lynne was especially perturbed because the dog’s tongue still had crotch batter on it. There…that is the only possible explanation.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I worry about your imagination sometimes Linda….
LikeLiked by 1 person
It’s funny, others have said the same thing…
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ok. Here is the story.
I was preparing dinner when Lynne left. The kitchen window was wide open. When walking away from our house Jess spooked a neighbours cat which jumped straight in through the open window and knocked a saucepan of vegetables off the stove and down my legs. As the veg included peas I guess you could say the cat pead on me…
Anyway. I evicted the cat. Cleaned up the kitchen and was changing my trousers when Susan got home.
LikeLiked by 6 people
I doubt anyone managed to guess that.
LikeLiked by 1 person
That is outstanding! What did Susan say when she saw you changing? What did her parents say when they saw her next? What did Lynne say when she heard what happened? How did the cat feel about all of this? I think this post needs a sequel.
LikeLiked by 2 people
I totally agree Linda 😎
LikeLiked by 2 people
😄😄😄😄😄😄 i would never ever have guessed that!
What about the food then ?
LikeLiked by 2 people
Wow ,she must have believed u in the spot as none would invent a such improbable excuse……I wonder if the mother in law would have tho?😂😂😂😂
LikeLiked by 2 people
Notice nobody asked if the pan was boiling….😢😉😄
LikeLiked by 1 person
awwwww Was it?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Nope. In fact the peas had just come from the freezer so it was bl**dy cold!
LikeLike
You suffer so. I want to know more about what the parents said! I would have wanted to set them. Say something over the hedge that sounds absolutely damning but tell Susan what you are going to do. When Susan gets home just tell her loudly what ‘happened’ and see the reaction. I’m so evil. 😉
LikeLike
I used to do all sorts of stuff like that😄. Living next to the outlaws, sorry, inlaws was a bit stifling for me so I did act up a lot. By this stage I suspect their reaction would just be an eye roll! Susan’s mum was definitely suspicious.
Coincidentally we went to Lynne’s wedding last month. She and Susan have been best friends since they were toddlers.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Is that the wedding where you met the Harry Potter castle Lady?
LikeLiked by 1 person
That’s the one!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Haha sorry I had to scroll straight for the answer. My imagination is somewhat naughty these days hahahaha. Great story of a sequence of unfortunate events lol
LikeLiked by 2 people
My imagination is rather naughty too so I quite understand😊😉💕
LikeLiked by 2 people
Haha good not to be alone here lol 😉
LikeLiked by 2 people
Dirty dog! 😄
LikeLiked by 2 people
Reblogged this on Rattiesforeverworldpresscom.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thanks! I’m sure Darren will appreciate it, too!
LikeLiked by 2 people
He does indeed😊💕
LikeLiked by 1 person
❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you😊
LikeLiked by 2 people
You re welcome 🙂
LikeLiked by 2 people