Guest in Jest #30 OVER THE HILL ON THE YELLOW BRICK ROAD

CONVERSATION WITH…CINDERELLA’S FAIRY GODMOTHER…Holding Onto Her Magic in Older Age

OVERTHEHILLONTHEYELLOWBRICKROAD

Over the Hill on the Yellow Brick Road, I passed an Assisted Living Center. I wondered who might live there.  A ham and cheese sandwich came out and cried, “Welcome! I’m Cinderella’s Fairy Godmother!”  I tried to respond with sensitivity…

Uh, actually, I think  you’re a ham and cheese sandwich.  You might be just a tad confused.

FAIRY GODMOTHER:  Ah ha ha.  I can see why you’d say that.  But I AM Cinderella’s Fairy Godmother.  I just had an unfortunate mishap.  I combined two different spells as an experiment and accidentally turned myself into ham and cheese on rye.

Oh. Of course.

FAIRY GODMOTHER: I’m not going to stress over it.  I have my health. That’s what matters.

Well…but…aren’t you going to turn yourself back into a Fairy Godmother?

FAIRY GODMOTHER: The problem is, I can’t remember how to do it right now.  I can’t recall which two spells I combined.  I’m having a senior moment.

Sometimes I can’t remember little things, too.  It’s so annoying and upsetting when I can’t recall names of movie actors… or internet passwords…or names of people I went to school with.

FAIRY GODMOTHER: Same here. But I try not to let it interfere with my creative process. I’m still an artistic soul.

I admire that. You know, I’ve been in creative meetings at my job when people realize I’ve already mentioned an idea… but I don’t remember I’ve said it before.  It’s embarrassing. I feel like quitting. I think I’m too old to be there.

FAIRY GODMOTHER: Hogwash. I don’t let that stuff hold me back. It is what it is.  I remind myself I bring a lot to the table.  And other people might not have the same assets I do.

I wish I had your confidence.

FAIRY GODMOTHER: You just have to take a deep breath and remember to look at your whole being. And if you have a shortcoming because of your age, figure out a way to make it work for you.

How?

FAIRY GODMOTHER: Well, for example, if one of my original magic spells is dated, I come up with a replacement that others might not have imagined.

Which one of your spells is dated?

FAIRY GODMOTHER: I’ve noticed not many people want to turn pumpkins into coaches these days. I did that for Cinderella to get to the ball, but now it’s old-fashioned. So instead of feeling like a useless fairy, I let my imagination run wild and created a new spell.  Now I turn microwaves into self-driving limousines.

I’d ride in one of those any day.

FAIRY GODMOTHER: Thank you! Then you’ll like this one!  People don’t want glass slippers with high heels anymore—like the kind I made for Cinderella.  The whole “suffer for beauty” thing is dying out.  So I designed a glass sneaker with memory foam.

Brilliant. 

FAIRY GODMOTHER: Thank you again!  You know, I’d love to talk more, but I have to meet Old Mother Hubbard in the dining room. She’s saving me a seat at her table for dinner.

Okay, sure.  But before you go, if you don’t mind that I’m asking, aren’t you just a little concerned about remaining a ham and cheese sandwich for the rest of your life?  What if you never remember how to turn yourself back?

FAIRY GODMOTHER: I’ve got it covered.  At the stroke of midnight, all my spells end. I always turn back into whatever I was before.

I guess SOME old spells are still the best.

 

 

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1. Give us some info about your blog.  Make sure to add a link to it.
2. Write up something amusing.  It doesn’t have to be “laugh out loud” funny, but a bit of humor would be great.
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The piece can be anything that is humorous.  A story, a recollection, even something as simple as a joke.

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The featured image was created by Silas at  My weird, crazy and mundane life Journal