My husband Bill isn’t one who revels in technology. He has only recently learned how to email. Yes, I know. I know all too well what you are thinking. Browsers baffle him. If he has a problem and I ask him a question about it, he throws his hands in the air and says: “I don’t know what I’m doing, I have no business trying to do this!” Still, he struggles on. Mostly because I told him I wasn’t going to be the go-between for emails or Facebook posts his friends wanted to send him. I was done enabling him. It was time for some tough love.
I won’t say he’s a knuckle-dragging troglodyte when it comes to technology, but I wouldn’t be too far off the mark. The idea of a laptop was overwhelming to him so I handed him my ancient iPad and we set to work. His friends called him One Button Bill. If it had more than one button, he would be frustrated. I lovingly pointed out that the iPad had only one button. I swear that’s the only reason he agreed to give it a go. I know there is a learning curve, but it’s tough to teach when someone doesn’t want to learn. He might not be a knuckle-dragger, but he’s extremely competent at foot-dragging!
This was not his only resistance to technology. He held out for years before he gave in and got a cell phone. YEARS! When he finally acquiesced, he chose one of those little flip phones. You can make calls on it and even text if you have a great amount of patience. After all, you have to hit each key a few times before you actually get the letter you want. It’s painful to watch. It’s even painful to hear. Beep boop beep…all the tones are a little different and there are times when I swear he’s playing Mary Had a Little Lamb just to drive me crazy!
Bill got his first cell phone about 9 years ago. For the first six years, he wouldn’t even turn it on unless he wanted to make an outgoing call. It took many more years before he learned how to text. I still don’t know what possessed him to take that giant leap! A couple of years ago his phone died. Yup, he had gotten seven years out of that little flip phone, but now it was time to move on. I was hoping he’d finally get a smartphone. Texting would be so much easier. He could check the weather. Even if he did nothing else with it, it would be worth getting. This is where I was wrong.
Bill steadfastly dug his heels in and replaced his old flip phone with a new flip phone. I didn’t even know they still made them! I called it his dinosaur phone. I protested! I tried to dissuade him. I cajoled. I nagged!!! Finally, he got exasperated with me and said:
“You know how some people are high tech? And some people are low tech? Well, I’m NO tech!”