I want to apologize up front for anything I say below that you think could be viewed as untoward.  I apologize because everything was meant to be untoward and if you only think it MIGHT be, I haven’t done my job properly.  I also want to apologize for the length of this post, but it was necessary.  There were extenuating circumstances.  Weren’t there, Nel?
I am very honored that Nel has nominated me for this award and rather surprised.  I’m not sure if she has a high tolerance for my foolishness or if she actually seeks it out.  For some reason, she brings out the worst in me.  For some reason she likes it.  Go figure.
Please, PLEASE check out her blog reactionary tales  You will be truly glad that you did.  If the spirit moves you, please give her a good dose of silliness or be a little snarky and tell her you’re channeling me.  You will avoid being blamed for said snarkiness and it will free me up for other things for a bit.  It is difficult to keep up a truly superb level of snark without a break here and there, so I’d really appreciate it.  Oddly, so would Nel.

 

**The Rules:**

• Share the link to the blogger who has shown love to you by nominating you.

• Answer the questions.

• In the spirit of sharing love and solidarity with our blogging family, nominate 8-13 people for the same award.

• Ask them 3 questions.

 

Nel’s questions to me which I am totally ignoring…see  reasons below

• If you could pick a book to turn into a movie adaptation, what would it be?

• What inspires you most about your blog?

• What author inspires you (doesn’t have to be a book; can be a film director or music composer)?

• Bonus question because I’m listening to The Circle of Life: What’s your favorite Disney song???
Yeah, well you should know that Nel wussed out by passing the questions that were put to her on to her nominees.   Nel, you can NOT just pass on the questions.  I forbid it.  Ok, I can’t actually forbid it but I can rebel and resist and throw a pretty impressive tantrum. And I will! I will ask my own damned questions and then answer them.  I am thus proclaiming myself the God of Questions.  I just thought you ought to know.
Nel, just to punish you for your errant behavior, I am going to nominate you.  Yes, you read that correctly.  You are going to be re-awarded!  No, not rewarded, silly woman!  re-Awarded.  That’s right.  Take THAT!
One little disclaimer here….wait, TWO little disclaimers here:  I did something very similar to what Nel is doing here in another award so I really don’t have a leg to stand on as far as this rant goes.  Also, I am not answering her recycled questions because her nominator’s questions were hard and I’d probably have glossed over them anyhow. Here’s an example of how I would have skimped on said questions:

Book to movie adaptation…Something with robots in it, and animals, and space ships, and cavemen, and sharks (lots of sharks) and maybe a watchmaker.  Yeah…that.

What inspires me about my blog… My interactions with my fellow bloggers.  Commenting back and forth is the best!

Author inspires blah blah… Tom Robbins_

Disney song...Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious . C’mon!  Who doesn’t love singing that song?
Damn it!  I just answered the questions that I said I wouldn’t answer to show why I didn’t want to answer them.  I have the whole Catch 22 thing going on here.  I blame Nel.  Don’t be a Nel.  Don’t give me that whole Catch 22 thing because I’m on thin ice as it is.  It’s June, thin ice is bad this time of year.

 

*My questions to ME and to my nominees….See what I did there, Nel?

1. If you could live in a Dr. Seuss book, which would you pick? I would pick  “Oh, The Places You’ll Go!”  Thought I was going to talk about cats or fish or  Hortons, didn’t you?
2. If you could have perfect weather, what would it be? I would like the temp to be in the eighties, a nice breeze, mostly sunny but just enough interesting clouds to hold my attention.  But not too many because then I’d be shaded and I like the feel of the sun on my skin. Plus, it’s really rude when clouds throw shade.  Some people like rainbows.  All I’m asking for is a warm gentle breeze kind of day with exactly the right number of clouds.  Those clouds should have interesting shapes, too.  Like a dragon.  Yes, I would like a warm zephyrous day with a precise number of clouds (11) with one of them being dragon-shaped.  If I couldn’t have that, I’d take a thunderstorm.
3.  What question would you like to ask yourself?  What would the answer be? I would ask about Dr. Seuss books and a weather-related question.  I would answer them like I did above.  Done/done!

Nel’s bonus question that anyone can answer if they want to…but Nel must!  I insist!

You’ve just awoken.  You haven’t had your coffee/tea/preferred caffeine delivery system yet, and the following people are making demands of you as you endeavor to start your day.   What do you say to each of them?

1. Husband/wife/domestic partner:

2. Child

3. Pet

4. Boss

5. X with X being a person/being of your choice

6. Mailman

7. A fellow blogger  (not me because I know what you’d say to me!)

8.  Barista

9. Neighbor

10. Random guy in elevator
Ok Nel, I know you REALLY enjoyed that question so let’s go back and do a different take on it so we can compare.  Go through questions 1-10 and tell us what you would say after having caffeine.  Knowing your penchant for trying to get away with things, I can imagine you’ll try to tell us that you don’t indulge in caffeine.  Let me stop you right there, missy!  That response is unacceptable.  If you TRULY don’t use caffeine then I am still going to make you answer the questions theoretically.  Uhuh!  You have to make up the responses.  You’re a writer. You can do this.

Knowing your penchant for trying to get away with things, I can imagine you’ll try to tell us that you don’t indulge in caffeine.  Let me stop you right there, missy!  That response is unacceptable.  If you TRULY don’t use caffeine then I am still going to make you answer the questions theoretically.  Uhuh!  You have to make up the responses.  You’re a writer. You can do this.
Now that I’ve made a complete dog’s breakfast out this wonderful award,  here are my victims er nominees:

 

**Nominees:**

 

Nel

General Topics

nicolesundays

magicandbeauty

gardeninglimited

sosimplyso

houstonphotojourney

Feel free to totally skip this award because I’ve made it absolutely ridiculous. I have asterisked the parts that non-Nel’s need to know.  The rest is just my usual craziness.   So no need to get involved in this silliness unless you want to.  Except for Nel…she’s gotta do it!

Have fun with this!

Love, mainepaperpusher

Yes, love to you, too Nel.  Especially to you.  ❤️💕❤️💕❤️

 

Advertisements

24 thoughts on “The Unique Blogger Award-Snark Version

  1. I’m literally on the floor. HAHAHA! For the record I read the first paragraph twice! TWICE! And i’m thinking I’m going to read it all over again. How did you know I don’t indulge in caffiene?! Are you psychic?? Maybe that’s why I love your snark so much because you read my snark which translated to your snark which you then bounced back to me for more snarkiness. REWARDED is right! This is a total treat and it is MOST DEFINITELY slated for tomorrow’s post. I’m hoping it will make people chuckle a bit after reading about whatever endangered animal I decide to write about, PLUS! it gives me time to come up with supercalifragilisticexpialidocious answers. Love you more!!!! ❤

    Liked by 2 people

    1. How did I know you don’t indulge in caffeine? It just seemed so Nel-like. Plus, I had an idea that you’d try to get out of this. I wasn’t about to let you get out of this. I have no idea why you have such an effect on me. I’m serious, it’s totally weird. It’s like we have this insane bond that thrives on snarkiness. Whatever it is, it’s fun!

      Liked by 2 people

  2. The saying goes “some people march to the beat of a different drum” well you my dear have a complete rhythm section . It is wonderful to once again be getting you post, I have been missing my chuckles.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I just wanted to quickly say, “Everyone Else Has The Best Titles”. Oh my gosh, priceless and so true!😂😂😂😂😂

    Like

  4. This was wonderful and had so much personality! Loved the very first joke, especially, and the eccentric Q&A. What happens if I totally ignore your questions totally ignoring Nel’s (or not exactly Nel’s) questions?

    Like

    1. You may totally ignore and or all questions. This is for fun. No work required. Though if you want to give anyone a hard time, this is a good place to do it. Haha, I wonder what the creator of the Unique Blogger Award would think? I’m so bad, so very very bad.

      Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s