Squirrel!

I like to feed the birds.  Like everything else I do, I enjoyed doing it to the extreme.  I had bird feeders all over the place.  The birds were very happy.  Then the red squirrel arrived.

I think squirrels are absolutely adorable.  Logically, I realize they are nothing more than rats with fuzzy tails.  But I can’t help it, I like squirrels.  I got a kick out of our squirrel’s antics as he hung from feeders and scurried up the lilac.  Bill was less amused than I.

Bill is very practical.  He knew that squirrel was trouble.  I blithely kept feeding the birds and therefore, the squirrel.  Then we heard a noise in the wall.  This wasn’t good.  It meant Bill was right!  It’s never good when Bill is right because it usually means I’m wrong.  It was decided that we had to get rid of the squirrel, MY squirrel.  Ok, I’d become attached, I’ll admit it.  I was sad, but I knew it was the right thing to do.

Our possible plans for squirrel eradication were many.  We could poison him.  NO WAY! We could figure out a way to let the cats or dogs scare him off.  No!  Finally, it was decided that we would trap the little bugger and relocate him.  It had to be done no matter how much I’d miss the little guy.

I acquired a Havahart trap and set it up.  The next morning our little squirrel had been trapped.  Bill prepared to take him elsewhere.  It was the middle of winter and I was worried.  I kept giving Bill “suggestions.”  Take him into town where he’ll have a better chance to find shelter!  Put him near a house that has bird feeders so he’ll have something to eat.  I wasn’t above the treachery of transferring my problem squirrel to some other person with a bird feeder.  It was bad, I admit it, but it was cold and I liked my little squirrel.

Bill returned from his trip to town.  He was jubilant!  Not only did he get rid of the offending squirrel, but he also fulfilled all of my requirements.  He let the squirrel go near the town salt shed which was always open so the squirrel would have shelter.  It was near a few houses and some of them had bird feeders!  I made my peace with the situation till the next day.  There was my squirrel eating and frolicking just as before.  We obviously had another squirrel.  I tried to hide my smirk and I would like to think I succeeded, but I’m not sure.

I set the trap again and sure enough, a second squirrel!  Bill made his trek into town.  He was quite happy to tell me that now the first squirrel would have a family member to keep him company.  This scenario happened seven times.  SEVEN!  I couldn’t believe that we had seven squirrels.  Each time Bill took them to the very same place.  Each time he felt vindicated.

In spite of his justifiable concern that the squirrels were trouble, I like to imagine that there is a large family of squirrels in town who will tell their grandchildren about the very nice lady in the country who generously fed them sunflower seeds.  I also like to imagine that they curse the big meanie who took them from their comfy rural home. Vindication is one thing.  Proving me wrong is quite another!